Teenagers scare the living [censored] out of me....
I'm going to change my last name to Henderson. Because I need a mean old lady name and there never was a Mean Ole Miss Johnson.
Yes, that's right. I've become an old lady. A Mean Ole Lady. And not just because certain body parts are shifting their altitude (though they are, sadly).
It all started today when I was catching the bus to go into town (and I had to run for it, mind, you'd think the driver would have waited for an old lady like me). When I got on the bus, I encountered that greatest thorn in my side, the Teenage Girl. And she was staring. I mean a full on up-and-downer, accompanied by Teenage Scowl. You know the one. "Oh my God, my life is so HARD, I don't even know why I'm on this bus, I should be at home in my basement listening to My Chemical Romance painting my nails black, and why didn't Bella just pick Jacob, GOD."
Now, if there's one thing I cannot abide, it is the prevalence of staring here in New Zealand. These people are unstoppable and blatant. I think it comes from living in a country that is still stuck in the 1960s where you don't get stabbed for staring too long at someone, but I seem to recall seeing some article in archives that told me that even in the 1960s, starting was rude, dammit. There is no excuse.
If there is another thing I cannot abide, it is the pathos of the Teenage Girl. These creatures confound me. Actively surly and contemptible, I simply do not understand them, nor do I have patience for them. In fact, central to my decision not to have children is the fact that I have identified the risk that I might have a beautiful baby girl who would one day grow into a Teenage Girl. That very thought gives me nightmares.
So, anyway, this little strumpet gave me the up and down and I scowled back, made a nasty comment, and shuffled back to my seat.
And then! Just as I was getting off the bus, some stupid kid almost took me out by riding his bike on the sidewalk. Oh, the crankiness that ensued. So I was walking down the street muttering under my breath about the kids these days, when some a-hole driver failed to yield to me in the crosswalk.
!!!
I could have been hit! At that moment, I wished I actually had a cane to shake at them. I might have even given their bumper a tap with it, that's how close they were.
And get off my lawn!
Yes, that's right. I've become an old lady. A Mean Ole Lady. And not just because certain body parts are shifting their altitude (though they are, sadly).
It all started today when I was catching the bus to go into town (and I had to run for it, mind, you'd think the driver would have waited for an old lady like me). When I got on the bus, I encountered that greatest thorn in my side, the Teenage Girl. And she was staring. I mean a full on up-and-downer, accompanied by Teenage Scowl. You know the one. "Oh my God, my life is so HARD, I don't even know why I'm on this bus, I should be at home in my basement listening to My Chemical Romance painting my nails black, and why didn't Bella just pick Jacob, GOD."
Now, if there's one thing I cannot abide, it is the prevalence of staring here in New Zealand. These people are unstoppable and blatant. I think it comes from living in a country that is still stuck in the 1960s where you don't get stabbed for staring too long at someone, but I seem to recall seeing some article in archives that told me that even in the 1960s, starting was rude, dammit. There is no excuse.
If there is another thing I cannot abide, it is the pathos of the Teenage Girl. These creatures confound me. Actively surly and contemptible, I simply do not understand them, nor do I have patience for them. In fact, central to my decision not to have children is the fact that I have identified the risk that I might have a beautiful baby girl who would one day grow into a Teenage Girl. That very thought gives me nightmares.
So, anyway, this little strumpet gave me the up and down and I scowled back, made a nasty comment, and shuffled back to my seat.
And then! Just as I was getting off the bus, some stupid kid almost took me out by riding his bike on the sidewalk. Oh, the crankiness that ensued. So I was walking down the street muttering under my breath about the kids these days, when some a-hole driver failed to yield to me in the crosswalk.
!!!
I could have been hit! At that moment, I wished I actually had a cane to shake at them. I might have even given their bumper a tap with it, that's how close they were.
And get off my lawn!
posted by E. at
1:39 AM
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